@TheDizzyBeauty: When I'm texting, I start typing faster when i see you're typing too. Oh, IT'S ON!! #amazingrace
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@AristotlesNZ: Me: I don't like online shopping. I'm old school. I need to touch it, smell it, taste it. Her: I still need you to leave our lingerie store.
@bobvulfov: day 1: dear diary i have been stranded on a desert island day 18: im starting to think that help will never come day 120: i was rescued by a couple fishermen! day 121: i have been dropped back off on the island because i kept saying “thank cod u guys found me” to the fishermen
@Brianhopecomedy: *Puts on muscle shirt* *Looks in mirror* Maybe it takes a few minutes to kick in.