@jwoodham: When in doubt, ask yourself WWBD: What Would Beyoncé Do? Would she apply for a job? Nope. She'd just show up one day like "I work here now."
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@HousewifeOfHell: The Good News: My doctor says I'm healthy as a horse. The Bad News: She used another large farm animal to describe my weight.
@MrT1M: Public restrooms are weird. The guy in the stall next to me has four feet and is wearing heels on one pair.
@bobvulfov: KENNEDY: lets keep our affair a secret MARILYN MONROE: ok i'll sing happy birthday all sexy & weird at ur bday K: pls dont MM: *winking* ok
@Scigglez: I'll never understand the appeal of TV shows about food. To me that's like listening to the Victoria Secret Fashion Show on the radio.