@funnyordie: When it comes to Pope vs. Trump, do you take the side of the guy who wears that ridiculous thing on his head or the Pope?
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@TheBigBatman: During childbirth the pain is so great that a woman almost knows what it's like for a man to have the flu.
@KeetPotato: priest: "does anyone here know why these two should not be wed?" me: "SHE LEAVES THE VOLUME ON ODD NUMBERS" priest: [slowly closes bible]