@Breadery: When my kids misbehave we watch 'Honey, I Shrunk the Kids' and then I make them stand in a giant Petri dish while I set up the machine.
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@Bez: When someone texts "whatcha doin" after midnight the appropriate response is "someone else" even if you're just eatin' pizza all alone.
@internetluke: "STOP IT STOP IT. CUT. THIS IS ALL WRONG" I scream at my cats dressed like vampires. "This is NOTHING like Twilight!!"