@GreenishDuck: When people start praying before a meal, I close my eyes and imagine how far I could throw a potato if I really put my heart into it.
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@NoogsCorner: That awkward moment when Batman opens the condom compartment instead of the Batarang compartment in his utility belt.
@rachaelkelly18: The lady at the bakery who draws her eyebrows on is looking extra surprised today
@DrDogMD: DR DOG: It says you're here for a blood test. First, some questions. Number one: over the last six months who's been a good boy?
@whereami18: My 12 wakes up, showers, changes into another pair of PJ's and starts playing PS4. He has no idea how jealous I am.