@Sassafrantz: When people stay in a horrific relationship instead of breaking up, I assume they killed someone together.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MoistPork: Men: Don't lie to your woman, she'll catch you. Don't tell her the truth, she'll be pissed. Just pray for a brick to fall on your head.
@TJ_Whitehead: By my calculations, I've spent approximately $39 throughout my life to watch bananas turn brown on my kitchen table
@TomMughal: I just got mistaken for an employee at a haunted house. Assume it's because I look authoritative not because I look like I'm wearing a mask.
@Underchilde: Wife: “Take me to bed or lose me forever.” Husband: *Thinks about it for 45 minutes*