@curlycomedy: When people write, "your dumb," maybe it's not a typo--they just mean stupidity belongs to you. "Here's your dumb now leave."
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@djdarrellripley: Him: I'd be happy to (using finger quotes) screen the applicants. Me: I'd be happy to (using finger quotes) testify in the harassment suit.
@Tierno158: When I refer to kids as "Snot-dripping, germ-spreading spawns of Satan" I hope you realize I'm not referring specifically to YOUR children.
@thenatewolf: *I hold my date's hand for the first time* Date: I've got butterflies in my stomach Me: same. I ate A LOT of butterflies before this