@YesImMatt: When people's driving tweets end mid sentence, did the paramedics find their phone and hit send?
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@Bagyants: The term "Expecting a baby" implies uncertainty. Like we're almost sure it's a baby, but could also be a bushel of potatoes, who knows
@Aspersioncast: My daily horoscope says I just lost all of my decent followers by posting my daily horoscope on Twitter.
@IbecameMyDad: If someone brought me coffee right now I would follow them around like an imprinted baby bird forever.