@joeldanger: When Santa's helpers take pics of themselves is it called an Elfie?
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@mjkspeaks: [interview] HIM: have u ever bribed anyone? ME: *pulls a package of OREO's from briefcase and slides across table* depends on who's asking
@girl_a_whirl: [ER] *covered in blood holding eyeball Name? Stacy What's wrong? *nods to eyeball Looking at the chart, rate your pain I'm the winky face
@pleatedjeans: Bikes are held up by witchcraft if u can ride a bike you are a level 1 wizard & if u can ride a unicycle you are a level 2 dork haha owned
@DanMentos: me: any historical figure? wizard: that’s right [later at dinner] Beethoven: you seem disappointed me: *hiding dog treats* it’s fine