@Jake_Vig: When someone compliments you, etiquette dictates that you respond with "That is accurate."
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@MsCassieDaniels: Disease doesn't care if you are a celebrity, Micheal J. Fox has battled Parkinson for 22 years, and Jamie Lee Curtis is super irregular!
@GirlRestrained: Oh look a Spider...... Oh look Listerine.... Oh look spider wiggling for life.... Minty fresh dead spider
@PopSlapFunk: 5: "Dad, to be the man of the house, you need to wear pants." Me: ... 5: ... Me: "It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. Job's all yours."