@BBQJones28: When someone favorites instead of retweeting me I comfort myself by thinking "they're just keeping me to themselves"
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@possibilyss: In hindsight, i shouldn't have said 'surprise me' when the judge was about to sentence me
@B1gBrainsMcGee: "I guess we should make them sound like a space shuttle is taking off during an a-bomb explosion." -person who invented hand dryers
@ericarhodes: If I was a fashion designer Id call myself "who" so when celebs are asked who are they wearing they can say "Who?" "Yes who?" "Yes."