@LooseTalks_Girl: When someone is murdered, they always investigate the spouse 1st. That says everything about marriage.
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@T_Longstreth: [Girl over my house] "My ex boyfriend had this weird one-man-band thing. You dont, right?" [Unclipping my harmonica holder] Def not.
@weinerdog4life: The cops say I have to stop trying to fist fight the guy who tries to feed my house letters everyday.
@NervousJr: The same woman who said "I'm your mom not your friend" has sent me 17 Facebook friend requests.