@Brianhopecomedy: When someone rings the doorbell I say to my kids, "I think it's Santa Claus!" so I don't have to get up.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@VenusRockHobbit: If I ever noticed you waving frantically from inside a burning building I would totally wave back because I'm polite.
@adamochoa: freak people out in public restrooms by saying "come in" when they knock on the stall door