@pizzajaynow: When someone yawns, I like to yell "Surprise Dentist!" and stick my hand in their mouth, which is fun because I'm not really a dentist.
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@geowizzacist: (Me playing guitar) 3: Daddy what's this song called? Me: Going Nowhere. 3: I know that but what's this song called? Burned by a 3yo.
@bees_wingz: I was trying to get the bubbles out of my screen protector and I accidentally bought a horse on eBay.