@chrisdowning: When something at the hardware store says it's universal, that means it will fit every model on the market except the one you have.
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@Marlebean: Interviewer: Do you have any questions? Me: Truth or dare I: M: I:.. Dare M: I dare you to give me this job I:(under breath) Damn she's good
@Storminika: Hey Dog Walkers, technically, that dog can walk on its own. What it can't do is pick up it's own poop. You're just a poop collector.
@Sarcasticsapien: Describing anything that happens in 2017 makes me sound like a crazy person who just screams at park benches.