@JasonBerlin: When something falls in your mouth by accident and you eat it, it's a snaccident.
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@aparnapkin: One way to handle social anxiety is to pretend you are a ghost & people are staring at you because they have a gift they never asked for
@mrjohndarby: Interviewer: What skills do you have? Me: Mind control Interviewer: EXCELLENT YOUVE GOT THE JOB
@kcmoore51: Does everyone have that ONE follower who will Fav the hell outta every RT...but wouldn't even piss on your own tweets if they were on fire?