@Kalarlis: When the cashier asks for my signature, I just write "HELP ME" while maintaining eye contact
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@tinatbh: Me: Wanna see pics of my dog? Person: No Me: Great! This is him playing. This is him sleeping. This is him being the CUTEST DOG EVER.
@crunchenhancer: I eat my Chinese food just like any other American, with chopsticks, one grain of rice at a time.
@theshantilly: Me: What's w/the ice pack? 12: I have a headache. Me: Do you think it's a good idea to play video games if you have a headache? 12: Yes.