@AndyAsAdjective: When the chips are down, be a good friend & say a few kind words to the chips. See if that helps.
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@BlindChow: WIFE: why is the dog wearing a tux? ME: u said to groom him WIFE: i meant brush ME: oh…sorry buddy, wedding's off DOG: this is bullshit
@T_N_Crumpets: [Restaurant] Me: I know in your profile it said you were small but I didn[my date falls into her soup]
@shariv67: There was no bonus fry at the bottom of the bag. But the story has a happy ending. I found it later in my sports bra.