@Lunatic_times: when the lady in the elevator burst into tears I did the only thing a man could do in the situation. I fell to the floor and played dead.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AmberTozer: The government is dysfunctional and needs to be fixed I'll probably fall in love with it any minute
@tiffaynay: Burger King employee: what size [drink] would you like? Me (thinking she said 'side'): fries. BK: What? Me: *more forcefully* fries.
@That_Damn_Duck: My cat is walking a very fine line between being cute & being sold to the Korean restaurant down the street.