@Douchekevin: When the police officer asks how much have I had to drink tonight- 'all of it' wasn't as funny to him as it was to me.
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@theshantilly: Me: What's w/the ice pack? 12: I have a headache. Me: Do you think it's a good idea to play video games if you have a headache? 12: Yes.
@koalaslament: I always live in constant fear that a bicep avi is gonna steal my lady and treat her right