@TravLeBlanc: When the zombie apocalypse comes, we'll be the last to go because we never leave our houses.
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@causticbob: Breaking News. Apple is to buy Ireland to solve the debt problem. It will be rebranded iLand
@murrman5: police chief: you are using the police dogs wrong me watching a dog bark at a criminal in the interrogation room: give him five more minutes
@NicestHippo: You're an adult now. Stop lying about your life on Facebook and start doing it on LinkedIn