@weinerdog4life: When there were a lot footprints in the sand, that was a bunch of jesus's chasing you
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@junejuly12: When she says she needs more intimacy; she means your feelings, not your colonoscopy report.
@MsSouthernStems: The road to hell is paved with good intentions Note to self...avoid good intentions at all costs.
@_TheGreatGrizz_: That moment you are trying to figure out if you are Joey, Ross, or Chandler and you realize you're Gunther.
@RainbowJohnJ: A man once asked me what autodefenestration meant. Avoiding the question, I jumped out a window.