@SonofConway: When tragedy strikes your community, McDonald's will still be there to take your money.
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@chelliet22: Two days ago: omg, I'm so glad I found my watch, I'll never misplace it again! Today: *has zero clue where the hell my watch is*
@ANNIEwayyyy: Sorry I thought your older sister was your daughter and then made everyone else at the restaurant guess your age.
@TySmithdrums: Me: "Can I see the baby?" Sister: "Yes, but only if she's awake." Me, through a megaphone: "NOT A PROBLEM."