@TheDailySchmuck: When women go to the restroom together that's so you can make out, right?
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@HatfieldAnne: Dad used to remind us kids to check for copperheads hidden in the woodpile. Of less concern was giving an ax to a 10-year-old.
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Check out that car. It has 400 horses. 5-year-old: Where does all the poop go?