@3sunzzz: When you ask your waiter for an extra pickle, don't wink. It can easily be misinterpreted.
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@mjkspeaks: Accidentally pressed 2 for Spanish and Donald Trump's security team came out of nowhere to deport me.
@UnicornSyrup: I put my phone in "airplane mode" and threw it up into the air. It just fell and now my screen is cracked. Worst. Transformer. Ever .
@Sarcasmo718: Most meth cooks start by clicking on an ad to make $500-$800 a day working from home.