@randomlawless: When you get to my age, your milkshake still brings boys to the yard, but they're like "I'm lactose intolerant."
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@ipalatsky: - You got so drunk last night, you were dancing on the table in your underwear!! - Me? In my underwear? You must have left early.
@thomaskeamon: I just learned today that Cardi B's real name is belcalis almanzar. I said that shit out loud and my furniture started floating