@robdelaney: When you go in the other room I ask your dog what you look like naked.
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@iwearaonesie: a fun thing to do if your wife leaves her fb open: post an argument you had but switch who said what and watch her friends agree with 'her'
@WritePlay: this one has claws This one swims but can't fly This one is huge & runs funny This one bangs his head against trees - god making birds
@DanMentos: “I’ll have a rum and coke” Is pepsi ok? “Sure whatever” *hands you a pepsi and coke*
@theevilwriter: The local news says we can tell there's been a power failure with their new app. Call me old fashioned but the lack of lights tips me off.