@robdelaney: When you go in the other room I ask your dog what you look like naked.
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@seriouslyemily: Dipping your cats in blue paint and watching them chase each other is 1000x more entertaining than Avatar.
@VancityReynolds: People in LA are deathly afraid of gluten. I swear to god, you could rob a liquor store in this city with a bagel.
@mexinonblonde: *handsome, young man walks up* HYM-Ms. Me-Hold it Jr. Yes, I'm sexy. But young guys aren't my thing. HYM-You've toilet paper on your heel.