@Death_Buddy: When you swallow a spider in your sleep, eat some dead flies the morning after to ensure the spider gives you a positive Trip Advisor rating
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@Marlebean: I don't mean to sound racist, but why do all Chinese food takeout boxes look the same?
@ObscureGent: Nobody discretely coughs blood into a handkerchief while wearing a top hat anymore.
@cool_as_heck: ME: who's a good boy!! DOG: did you just misgender me you genderphobic heteronormative piece of shit ME: what DOG: bark