@buhsbaby_baby: When you unfollow me, I find your name on a Coke bottle, shake it up, put it back on the shelf and whisper "suck it" under my breath.
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@TheWoodenslurpy: To people calling themselves "Grammar Nazis": you’re not correcting grammar so much as punctuation or spelling. Hi, I’m a Nomenclature Nazi.
@mrtruthandsoul: *breaks out of prison *hunted by police for weeks *crawls thru 22 miles of mud to your house* Me: <taps on your window> DID YOU GET MY TEXT?
@murrman5: Hello 911. "He's back what do I do?" Brent? "Yes" It's the just the mailman remember "Ok, sorry." Bye "Wait, he put something in my mailbo