@TheTweetOfGod: When you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, it means you've been using Apple Maps.
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@Reverend_Scott: Ugh. "What's wrong honey?" My bad knee is acting up again. *knee robs a gas station*
@ComedicBust: As soon as I get to a party, I start saying goodbye; that way I'm out of there within 4 hours.
@TheBeerdedOne: Lottery gives you a 1 in 200M chance of skipping work tomorrow...alcohol is 1 in 5. You play your game...I'll play mine