@GayAtHomeDad: When your kid makes a funny face, say they will stick that way, then show them the thousands of girls with duck lips on Instagram.
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@AndyRichter: After all this Starbucks cup controversy, if Taco Bell was smart, they'd start serving their burritos in little cardboard mangers
@dxblarssonENG: I'm such a slave to the man working on a Saturday night. A drunk slave but whatever. Atleast my e-mails to my boss are hilarious now.