@FussySaffa: When your partner asks how many people you have ever slept with, answering 'what did I say the last time you asked?' is unwise, apparently.
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@jackmackenroth: My bank says my password isn't strong enough. Did it ever stop and think that my password has a lot going on right now?
@JerryThomas: I just bought an answering machine and it doesn't work. Or maybe I'm just asking it the wrong questions.
@Pundamentalism: My girlfriend was devastated to find out that my mates call me ‘The Love Machine’ because I’m terrible at tennis.