@FussySaffa: When your partner asks how many people you have ever slept with, answering 'what did I say the last time you asked?' is unwise, apparently.
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@thatUPSdude: Me: Want some of my nachos? Coworker: I don't like nachos. Me: Hello 911, what's consider premeditated murder?
@1CleverClogs: I am woman, hear me say the opposite of what I mean in that tone that means you'd better do what I meant and not what I said.
@2014longview: If you carry a baseball bat in your car, you should carry a glove too. Your lawyer will thank you.