@marknorm: When you're a kid and you have an accident you pee your pants. When you're an adult and you have an accident you have a kid.
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@mountainlex: I'm always surprised when heavily tattooed couples have a baby and it comes out blank
@fillthevacuum: If insanity is doing the same thing over & over and expecting different results, I must be sane cause I don't even like doing things once.
@Fred_Delicious: "sir, can i ask why you're smoking TWO huge blunts?" "officer, I'm..." *turns to camera* "double jointed" *cop starts breakdancing*
@pinupteacher: My cab driver just described Seattle as "Not that horrible of a place." Get that guy a job on the tourism board.