@BryMastas: When you're pushing 40, the real life challenge is to find the pic angle where you don't look like Jabba the Hut.
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@calamitydaisy: If you cannot afford a stenographer, a 4 year old will be appointed for you to repeat exactly what you said at all times. Do you understand?
@stephenjmolloy: Me: I'm not going to drink in 2017 *in hospital 3 days later* Doctor: You have to drink water you idiot
@sarahjeong: the turkey takes his mask off it's edward snowden obama groans, it's too late to unpardon him now
@Xoolun: My GFs family are religious which sux 1st time I stayed there her dad wouldnt let us sleep together Was a shame cuz he was very attractive