@BryMastas: When you're pushing 40, the real life challenge is to find the pic angle where you don't look like Jabba the Hut.
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@ilovepie84: This Teenage girl gave me attitude today so I called her the "Fattest Skinny person I have ever seen" that should confuse her for a while.
@BareChesty: 911: What's your emergency? Me: Hunting accident. I think my friend is dead 911: Can you verify that he's dead? *gunshot* Me: Yep, he's dead
@Fred_Delicious: where do y'all wanna go tonight? Bars? The club? "THE BOG OF DESPAIR" Gary, after the forest of skulls debacle you don't get to pick anymore