@canadian_egg: When you're sad, hug a kid. But make sure it's yours cuz that shit would be weird.
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@NicCageMatch: Trying to take the best instagram picture ever but the kittens keep drowning in the latte.
@DothTheDoth: No one wants to talk about Dracula's defining quality, turning into thousands of bats to avoid human contact.
@michaelianblack: Common courtesy: don't bring McDonalds French fries on the plane unless you bring enough for everybody.
@jwoodham: "You know who needs more attention? Celebrities. Maybe we could give them trophies or something." Good idea, Oscar. What'd you have in mind?