@farleftcoast: Whenever anyone quotes the Bible to me I quote Harry Potter to them because I too love a good magical fiction book.
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@chris_isloi: I'm going to subtly spread my brownie crums across your car because I silently resent you for changing the song.
@okimstillhungry: Who thought blowing out candles on a cake was a good tradition? Ah yes; wax would go well with this cake and you know what else? Child spit.
@birbigs: "You're joking about calling it Good Friday, right? I told you the part about the nails?" -Jesus #GoodFriday