@SteveMartinToGo: Whenever I hear someone died of natural causes, I think, "Wait a minute. I have that."
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@JONOCOYOTE: •a lion stalks a fawn• •a man steps out from behind tree• I'm Chris Hansen from NBCs to catch a predator, do u know how old that deer is?
@sunexplode: Keep your longtime co-workers guessing and questioning their self-worth by forgetting their names.
@infamousone96: Boss: "You're not suppose to be drinking on the job!" Me: "You're not suppose to cheat on your wife." Boss: "Keep up the good work sir."