@sbellelauren: whenever i trip a skinny girl running in only a sports bra i feel like i'm doing god's work
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@weinerdog4life: I get knocked down, but I get up again, and you're never, oh you knocked me down again, you are being very rude
@Parentpains: Weird, my coworker has bragged all day about his pending vacation and now his headlights have kicked themselves in.
@dsmitty62: Told my mom I hit 1200 Twitter followers. She pointed out how my brother owns a house and I'm wanted by several collection agencies. Oh ma!