@jonnysun: whenever i watch the tv show Friends, i imagine im the seventh friend, Dirk, who just stays home while all his friends do stuff without him
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AthenaMystique: *texts god* Me: yo, can we add "being a grammar nazi" to the list of sins? Their annoying. God: *they're
@elizabeth_fels: PUTIN: If your American lover is in this room I'll kill him ELENA: He's not! PUTIN: (softly) u...s... [bursting from closet] A! USA! USA!
@murrman5: Look, you invented bread and I invented knives. Let's combine forces and we could be the best thing since...well we'll think of that later.
@DillDoes: Being a worm must great. Its like "wow that dirt was great I hope there's more" and there always is