@UnicornSyrup: Whenever people say "anything is possible", I think about trying to staple pudding to a tree.
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@GringoBrulee: My first kid will be named Gotham. That way when I have to get up in the middle of the night when they're crying I can say "Gotham needs me"
@KKAlThani: If you don't get sarcasm, follow these simple steps that will definitely help you understand it easily: Die.
@FatherWithTwins: 8yo: I want to paint my pumpkin this year! Me: Cool, what color? 8yo: Orange! Me: 8yo: Me: *pours drink* Let's do it