@HallpassCanada: Whenever someone asks how i'm doing & walks away before i answer..I write "GREAT" on the side of thier car with my keys!
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@MsSugar_Kisses: I need to chat with my coworker's husband.. If he was bangin' her properly, we wouldn't have to deal with her bad attitude..
@spcycucumber: Its not what it looks like officer! "you were driving down the highway taking selfies singing n'sync" Ok I guess it was what it looked like
@Dawn_M_: I never eat coins in front of vending machines because I don't want them to fall in love with me.
@stuckinaportal: [mastercard commercial] "there are some things that money can't buy" politician: i don't get it