@shariv67: Whenever someone says smart phones are turning people into zombies, look up from your phone just long enough to bite them.
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@HollyMemphis: If no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it than how bad of a decision can it really be?
@Sanbel11: Police officer: Have you had anything to drink? Me:No PO:Ok, blow into here Me:But there are no candles PO:Ma'am please get out of the car
@AGStr8upNinja: I purposely park three feet away from the drive thru window so Mcdonalds employees can get in their daily stretches.
@daemonic3: [at therapist] I don't know, sometimes I just feel invisible Therapist: WHO SAID THAT?!?