@WilliamAder: Whenever someone tells me they have an IQ of 140, I wonder if that's Fahrenheit or centigrade.
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@sageboggs: ME: why am I always anxious? maybe watching TV will help- NEWS: IF THE HURRICANE DOESN'T KILL YOU, CLOWNS WILL
@Donnie_Fairburn: "Son, hey son" Yeah dad? "Know why we named you Adopted?" *Sighs* Because I'm adop- "BECAUSE YOU'RE ADOPTED" Good one dad "I'm not your dad"