@NECROMANClNG: me: ok so imagine if you were a horse—
my sister: bold of you to assume i’m not, but continue
@scarfdud: my 80yr/o grandma is on facebook & she is a living click-bait article, she didn't even tell me what to do with it
@gojarbe: "and this blood shall be called A+"
all the other blood types: "k wow we're like right here"
@WheelTod: [On date]
Me: Duck! That's my wife outside the restaurant
Her: What!? Your profile said "single dad!"
Me: Exactly. We're a one dad family
@pmann555: They say it's not the destination, it's the journey.........Except when you're heading to the bathroom with diarrhea...
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