@omgthatspunny: Which US state has the smallest soft drinks? Minisoda
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@STEELERS1972: So I met this hooker who said she'd do anything for ten bucks . Guess who got his yard cut?
@TheCatWhisprer: They say you should eat 6 small meals a day to lose weight so being an overachiever I have been eating 26 a day.
@legreece: My dog doesn't always bark like there's an intruder in the house, but when he does he waits until I'm home alone and in the shower.