@krissywillbretz: Who called it "falling in love" and not "assisted suicide"?
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@kamtweeting: Give me a few strong men, and I'll build a nation. Give me a few hot women, and I'll conquer the world.
@JustASmirk: My wife is the most beautiful, intelligent person standing right behind me reading my Twitter feed.
@causticbob: Short skirts have a tendency to make men polite. Have you ever seen a man get on a bus ahead of one?
@AtticusFinch79: *takes off pants* *crawls into bed* Security Guard- Lady, this is Macy's *crawls out of bed* *puts on pants* SG- Those aren't your pants