@papasuncle: Who called it Scientology and not Cruise control?
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@BlairLoudly: I've easily spent 12% of my life chuckling at my own jokes and being grossed out by my own body. Also, I like random percentages.
@lisaxy424: 30 seconds staring confused at the calculator app before realizing why my phone wasn't calling the number I dialed.
@LittleMissZesty: Conversations with my pets: Me: Please could you Dog: OF COURSE! Me: I haven't said what it Dog: I LOVE YOU! Me: Please could you Cat: No.