@chuuew: Who called it your foot falling asleep and not coma toes?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@mishakey: You know those disgusting people who lick their fingers instead of using a napkin in public? Hi.
@JohnLyonTweets: Autocorrect is changing correctly spelled words. I'm starting to think it has a mind of its AUTOCORRECT IS HARMLESS. GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS.
@lloydrang: Will I. Am's headstone will read "Will I. Was," completing history's longest set-up to a punchline
@MrsMikePatton: Maybe if we press "2" for Spanish, we'll actually get someone that speaks English better then the person on the "1" line.