@KentWGraham: Who decided that a clown popping suddenly out of a metal box would be a good toy for young children?
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@TheHoyBoy_: When I go to someone's house & they tell me to make myself at home, the first thing I do is throw them out because I don't like visitors
@OuterJohn: When people do a bunny impression they go straight for the cute little front paws. Not me. I fearfully sprint into traffic.
@RobDenBleyker: I'll never forget what my grandfather told me before he died. He said "Never forget what I'm about to tell you" then some story about corn.
@timdonakowski: Been married six months and I can't even remember the last time I felt lucky on Google.