@WorldofWid: Whoever called it a "dust bunny" was in a super good mood.
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@JosesLovesYou: "O honey, it looks like you got your period last night. I guess well need to get new shee- wait! Wait one minute!" ~ Japanese flag designer
@TheBosha: Israel is like STOP TOUCHING ME and Palestine is like YOU'RE TOUCHING ME and Hillary is like I WILL PULL THIS CAR OVER.
@jeffporper: Just ordered a pizza and jogged past my gym holding it over my head like the Olympic torch.
@iamspacegirl: friends who just got married: We were kind of hoping you'd stick to the registry. me *crestfallen*: you don't like the jukebox of screams?